"Love Object" review

Love Object (2003)

Directed by Robert Parigi
Writing credits Robert Parigi

Desmond Harrington.... Kenneth Winslow
Melissa Sagemiller.... Lisa Bellmer
Udo Kier.... Radley

Why can't they write instruction manuals for relationships? This is the dilemma poor Kenneth, (Desmond Harrington), is in. Kenneth has a hard time connecting with people. His boss wants a three volume instruction manual cranked out ASAP. He gives a hot blonde, (Melissa Sagemiller), to Kenneth to help him work faster. Soon Kenneth is dreaming about what to do to his blonde co-worker with the help of a plastic Love Object he buys over the internet. "Nikki", the fake blonde, teaches Kenneth how to treat a woman right. But she is a jealous Love Object. Kenneth gets torn between his fake and real blonde. "Nikki" does not like to be pushed aside...

Kenneth says that everything is easy if you just read the instructions. It's too bad for him that no one wrote an instruction manual on how to be Kenneth. "Love Object" shows how easily blondes can make you insane. Kenneth slips away from reality as his Love Object starts to dominate his mind. But perhaps having a fake blonde is the best kind to have. Oh Nikki. They may call you fake but you're real to Kenneth.

"Love Object" was great. At last! Someone made a horror movie for me! Obsession, depravity, and blondes, blondes, blondes! All horror freaks should see this movie. You may notice a bit of yourself in Kenneth and his twisted ways. Hopefully you won't see too much. As for me, I found it so refreshing to see a horror flick go all the way. "Love Object" is the real deal.

One last thing, I was very distracted by the use of an obvious body double for Sagemiller. There are many scenes where her breast is exposed so that we can see her tattoo. You never see her face and her naked breast in the same scene. How can Sagemiller be my Love Object if I am denied the pleasure of voyeuristically leering over her naked flesh? Hmmmm...Come to think of it, maybe it's healthier if I don't see all the Sagemiller I can. Oh well. She does have a pretty smile though. Very pretty. Mmmmm...

SCORE: 3.5 out of 4 quality time with love objects