Saturday, June 17, 2006

"Busty Cops 2" review


Busty Cops 2 (2006)

Directed by Jim Wynorski

Glori-Anne Gilbert
J. Nichole Italiano-Zaza (as Nikki Nova)
Aimee Sweet

You know how some movies are described as “Critic proof”? Well, “Busty Cops 2” is a living, breathing example of that saying. The very idea of me writing a review for this movie is completely ridiculous. “Busty Cops 2” is a non-stop marathon of naked women, softcore sex and bad jokes aimed at a horny eighth grade mentality or anyone still sober enough at midnight who wants to watch some hot women get naked on Skinamax. In recognition of this reality, I have had two tequila shots and am chugging a beer as I write this. “Busty Cops 2” deserves my full attention. This joke of a movie has now inspired my first ALL PICTURE REVIEW! I, (like the filmmakers), know what you want! Screw the plot! Bring on the women!!

The bustiest of Busty Cops: Glori Anne Gilbert. I was glad to see that they didn't try to force Miss Gilbert into bed with some of the other Busty Cops. Her dislike for sapphic delights is pretty obvious. "Busty Cops 2" plays to her strengths. Lots of stripping and showering. Well done. See what I mean? She's flexible for a big woman. She towers over the other Busty Cops.

And I mean towers. Dominates. Looms large. She's huge! In all areas.


Glori-Anne likes what she sees. There's no doubt she belongs on the Busty Cops.
I like what I see. I will chug the rest of my beer to salute this picture.
It just wouldn't be a Wynorksi flick without the mighty Jay Richardson. Jay runs the Busty Cop squad. He has them investigating a couple of train robberies and a missing whale and ahh what difference does it make? I'm glad Jay is on the case but what's important here are the ladies. And the most important woman of all, the VIP, has got to be...
Nikki Nova! Nova is out of this world hot. I'm talking supernova! The way she moves, the way she pouts, the way she does, well, pretty much anything.
Oh and the way she snaps her hair back. I love that. I've always liked brunettes more than blondes. Nova seals the deal. Although for some reason Hollywood is obsessed with shoving blondes into these movies as much as humanly possible. Nova has them all beat.

She even looks hot when she's sleeping. She's not doing anything and she still looks good! I dare you to find a picture of her not looking hot. You'd have to look hard.

A favorite softcore flick tactic is to put Nikki in a scene with two other women. Bathtubs and showers are frequent settings. She must be the cleanest woman in Hollywood. Still not convinced? Try this next picture on for size...


I have only one thing to say. DAMNNNNNNNN!!!!
Aimee Sweet shows up as the "victim" of the train robbery. She also has the best sex scene in the movie. Well, actually two of the best sex scenes. It's pretty sweet. HAHA! Sweet? Aimee Sweet? Get it? I'm hilarious!
Sweet.
SPOILER ALERT - This picture gives away an important plot point! Ahh, who am I kidding? No one cares about the plot. And I mean NO ONE.
More shots of Nikki Nova showing what Nikki does best. Anything! I can't get enough. Can you?
Can you?

Until next time ladies.

SCORE: 2.5 out of 4 busty bat signals

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