"Flowers on the Razorwire" review

Flowers on the Razorwire (2004)

Directed by Hart D. Fisher

Wanda Curtis
Fred D'Amico
Mitsuho Otani

I was given this DVD as a birthday present. It makes me feel good that I have friends out there who know we so well. The tagline on the front of the DVD says, “Sooner or later…Everybody Bleeds.” I can only imagine what went through my friends minds when they saw that tagline and thought of me. It probably went something like this, “Here’s something that nut Dr. Gore would like. Hot woman on the cover, the promise of bloodshed, it’s all here for him.” Happy Birthday indeed.

“Flowers on the Razorwire” is a short film. It runs thirty minutes. It’s about a psychotic dominatrix named Flower who tortures a guy so that she can get him to tell her a scary story. He tells the tale of a hot Asian woman being trapped in an elevator with a possible serial killer. Scary!!! Could he be L.A.’s vicious serial killer everyone is blathering about? Is the hot Asian girl everything she seems? Will this snooze of a story save his life? Not bloody likely.

“Flowers on the Razorwire” plays like a calling card for the filmmakers. There’s not much meat on the bone here. Most of the movie is spent in the elevator where the boiler repairman tries to scare the girl with his knowledge of serial killers. Sorry to say she’s just not that good at conveying fear. It looked more like she was annoyed at possibly being stuck with a psychotic killer. Also, the dominatrix scenes were too brief to get the feeling the guy was getting tortured enough to fight for his life. Of all the stories he could tell, what in the world made him think of this one? Not scary enough for our sick Flower.
Overall, “Flowers on the Razorwire” doesn’t need to be seen. It has a little blood at the beginning and at the end but not enough to warrant a viewing. The DVD looked like it held many sick thrills inside. It was all a tease. Mistress Flower wouldn’t stand for it. Neither should you.

SCORE: 1.5 out of 4 hot Asians in an elevator